Shop Mobile More Submit  Join Login
About Varied / Hobbyist TanyaFemale/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 10 Years
Needs Core Membership
Statistics 304 Deviations 1,851 Comments 7,732 Pageviews
×

Newest Deviations

Literature
we want different things
four years, all ive wanted was you
four years, all you want is to get away
for years, i just wanted to get closer to you
for years, i just wanted you to fall in love with me
for years, i have fallen in love over and over with you
four years, are almost over
four years, and we will be apart
for years, ill miss you
for years, ill try to get over you
for years, ill hope you think of me
even if just for a second
even if you see a girl you thought was me
even if you do something you know i would have loved
i just want you to love me
why can't you love me
why cant you feel the way i feel
why cant i rid myself of my feelings for you
youve hurt me
over and over
over and over
over and over
again
:iconhorsesrock102:horsesrock102
:iconhorsesrock102:horsesrock102 0 1
Literature
Someone I Should Forget
I miss you
I miss how we used to talk all the time
I miss how I could be 100% myself around you
I miss how you always seemed so carefree when we were together
I miss the times we would sit and do nothing together
but still be happy just being around each other
I miss your kiss
I miss playing with you
I miss the music we shared
I miss your smell
I miss your touch
I miss the sweetness in your voice
Now all I've got left is a stuffed animal that
Used
To smell like you and bring me comfort
Now all it brings is pain
The pain of knowing it doesn't smell like you
Because I held it too tight
and the smell faded away
Just like  y o u    did
:iconhorsesrock102:horsesrock102
:iconhorsesrock102:horsesrock102 1 0
If you could by horsesrock102 If you could :iconhorsesrock102:horsesrock102 0 0 Pain by horsesrock102 Pain :iconhorsesrock102:horsesrock102 1 0 Christmas 2010 by horsesrock102 Christmas 2010 :iconhorsesrock102:horsesrock102 0 0 3D Bullshit by horsesrock102 3D Bullshit :iconhorsesrock102:horsesrock102 0 0 Spread - less than three by horsesrock102 Spread - less than three :iconhorsesrock102:horsesrock102 8 3 I've been bleeding by horsesrock102 I've been bleeding :iconhorsesrock102:horsesrock102 1 0 Random BG by horsesrock102 Random BG :iconhorsesrock102:horsesrock102 0 0 WIP: done by horsesrock102 WIP: done :iconhorsesrock102:horsesrock102 1 2 Because its all too much by horsesrock102 Because its all too much :iconhorsesrock102:horsesrock102 0 0 WIP: ID by horsesrock102 WIP: ID :iconhorsesrock102:horsesrock102 0 0 wolfand247 and I by horsesrock102 wolfand247 and I :iconhorsesrock102:horsesrock102 0 2 Babyyy by horsesrock102 Babyyy :iconhorsesrock102:horsesrock102 1 2 This. Is your brain. On drugs. by horsesrock102 This. Is your brain. On drugs. :iconhorsesrock102:horsesrock102 0 0 :D by horsesrock102 :D :iconhorsesrock102:horsesrock102 1 0

Favourites

Space Nails by KatieAlves Space Nails :iconkatiealves:KatieAlves 2,144 179 Northern Lights Nails by KatieAlves Northern Lights Nails :iconkatiealves:KatieAlves 1,301 74 Rainbow Print by KatieAlves Rainbow Print :iconkatiealves:KatieAlves 1,228 44 Gothic Ladybug by KatieAlves Gothic Ladybug :iconkatiealves:KatieAlves 2,898 233 Let it snow! by KatieAlves Let it snow! :iconkatiealves:KatieAlves 1,352 64 Midnight by KatieAlves Midnight :iconkatiealves:KatieAlves 4,020 210 Aqua: Mermaid Inspired Makeup by KatieAlves Aqua: Mermaid Inspired Makeup :iconkatiealves:KatieAlves 2,098 146 Colourful Fae by KatieAlves Colourful Fae :iconkatiealves:KatieAlves 1,329 70 Gradient Sparkles by KatieAlves Gradient Sparkles :iconkatiealves:KatieAlves 1,457 50 Sweet Disposition VII by saturdayx Sweet Disposition VII :iconsaturdayx:saturdayx 288 12 Sweet Disposition III by saturdayx Sweet Disposition III :iconsaturdayx:saturdayx 94 1 ROBBIE by saturdayx ROBBIE :iconsaturdayx:saturdayx 473 29 Feather by SusanCoffey Feather :iconsusancoffey:SusanCoffey 349 23 Profile by SusanCoffey Profile :iconsusancoffey:SusanCoffey 518 20 Darkness by SusanCoffey Darkness :iconsusancoffey:SusanCoffey 698 47 Barrie Blau by SusanCoffey Barrie Blau :iconsusancoffey:SusanCoffey 971 41

Watchers

Wishlist

The Sad Poem of a Dead Stair by x-horizon The Sad Poem of a Dead Stair :iconx-horizon:x-horizon 10,471 958

Activity


I have ceased drawing/painting/writing/etc for quite some time now and unfortunately, seem to be suffering because of it. My language is becoming less eloquent and my grammar and spelling is going downhill as well. It seems as though the saying "Use it or Lose it" is true in this situation. I would like to start writing again but I don't have any solid ideas or anything to really create with right now. I read some great boks by Johns Green which may have stifled my creativity in my head because I sit here and think 'How could I ever write something that good?.." but, whatever. My therapist says I have "the gift" so I need to pick it up again soon.

Since my last journal, I started taking anti-depressants, started talking to a psychologist, have been attending a trade school for about 6 months now, moved on from then-boyfriend and returned the lizard. I quite miss her to be honest. Now, I'm with a boy who makes me happy but we have our problems because of me. I mess things up a lot and I apologize and I try to make it better but sometimes, I make it worse and I'm sorry. I'm trying. I'm trying very, very hard..Give me time and I'll be better.

Maybe, I'll start a story with this or another series of poems, just to get everything out. I feel heavy and my spine always feels twisted and my mind is always somewhere else...

Also, I have quit the Cutco business. It was a hassle and basically required you to ruin all of your personal connections for their company and run your family and friend's families out of their money for some fancy (very high quality) knives. They harped on you and required you to call in at 8-9am every morning (including weekends) and report if you have appointments that day or not and if you say you don't continually, they tell you, pretty much, that you're not doing well and you're not gonna make any money (you were paid commission based on your sales and Cutco can't fire you because they considered you a partner, not an employee) and that is not motivating. So, I quit, spent some time looking for something else, went to interviews, tried very hard for things I wasn't interested in, did my best at an interview for something I was very interested in and have been working there since shortly before Christmas. It has great perks and they work with my schedule and I'm very happy to be working there except when I cant sleep, like tonight, and have to work at 8am to 5:30. ;D yayyyyy(not)

Anyway, I should try to sleep I suppose. Ugh. Tomorrow will be a fight.
  • Listening to: Kate McGill - Cursed
  • Reading: texts from my boyfriend. He's upset with me..

deviantID

horsesrock102's Profile Picture
horsesrock102
Tanya
Artist | Hobbyist | Varied
United States
Current Residence: Illinois
Operating System: A Computer.
MP3 player of choice: Ipod
Shell of choice: Turtle Shell
Skin of choice: My own?
Personal Quote: "Nothing is instant." - John Green, Looking For Alaska
Interests

Comments


Add a Comment:
 
:iconjasperinity:
Jasperinity Featured By Owner Aug 2, 2015
Happy birthday! :D
Reply
:iconjasperinity:
Jasperinity Featured By Owner Aug 2, 2014
Happy birthday! :D
Reply
:iconbirthdays:
birthdays Featured By Owner Aug 2, 2013
:woohoo: :party: :iconcakelickplz: !!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!! :iconcakelickplz: :party: :woohoo:

It's August 2nd which means it's that time of the year again and your special day is here! We hope you have an awesome day with lots of birthday fun, gifts, happiness and most definitely, lots of cake! Here's to another year!

Many well wishes and love from your friendly birthdays team :love:

---
Birthdays Team
This birthday greeting was brought to you by: ~KoudelkaW
Reply
:iconsummaresta:
Summaresta Featured By Owner Aug 2, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
:iconcolorfulsparkleplz::iconcolorfulsparkleplz::iconcolorfulsparkleplz:
:iconcolorfulsparkleplz::iconhappybirthday2plz::iconcolorfulsparkleplz:
:iconcolorfulsparkleplz::iconcolorfulsparkleplz::iconcolorfulsparkleplz:
Reply
:iconanimeno1fan:
AnimeNo1Fan Featured By Owner Aug 1, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:iconcuteicondividerplz::iconcuteicondividerplz::iconcuteicondividerplz::iconcuteicondividerplz::iconcuteicondividerplz::iconcuteicondividerplz::iconcuteicondividerplz:
:iconbummy1::iconbummy2::iconbummy3::iconbummy1::iconbummy2::iconbummy3:
:party::iconhappybirthday1plz::iconhappybirthdayplz2::iconhappybirthdayplz3::iconhappybirthdayplz4::party:
:iconcaekplz::iconbummyballoonplz::iconbirthdaycakeplz::iconbummyballoonplz::iconcaekplz:
:iconbummy1::iconbummy2::iconbummy3::iconbummy1::iconbummy2::iconbummy3:
:iconpinkbow2plz::iconpinkbow3plz::iconpinkbow4plz::iconpinkbow5plz::iconpinkbow6plz::iconpinkbow1plz::iconpinkbow2plz:
Reply
Add a Comment: